What health coaching is not

I read this really great blog post today. I think there are a lot of us that have been drawn into this crazy idea about dieting: "If you eat anything other than salads and work out every single day until you're a hot, sweaty mess you won't find the love of your life or find your dream job or be happy ever!!!" What. the. crap. Baloney! The problem is that all of us are believing this ginormous lie, and we are letting it affect our self esteem, what we go after, the way we talk to ourselves, everything.

I am not going to put you on a 1200 calorie diet.

I am not going to make you work out every day until you want to collapse.

I am not going to ask you to never eat ice cream again. (I would die. Probably literally.)

I want you to pursue the thing that makes you happiest.

I want you to fall deeply, hardly in love forever.

I want you to be empowered to stand up for yourself, always.

I want you to reject the things that make you feel bad.
I want to help you find the food that makes you feel amazing.

That's what my coaching is about. Did you know that vegetables, when fresh and prepared properly, can be as amazing as dessert? True story. I didn't know, either. I grew up on some canned green beans, and canned asparagus (that I always added half a shaker of salt to), and that nasty frozen vegetable mix with the lima beans in it (does anyone actually like that stuff?). No joke - until I was mid-20's, that was my view of vegetables. No one is going to eat vegetables that taste like that! 

The good news is: the nasty food syndrome applies to a whole bunch of foods that you were raised on. I can teach you how to make mac 'n' cheese that tastes better than anything you get out of the box and is healthier for you (even if you can't eat dairy). I can show you how to make veggies so good you will moan when you put them in your mouth. Yep. That fabulous.

Please don't buy into this idea that you have to be 'perfect' or 'on the bandwagon' and a bunch of other nonsense. Life is meant to be enjoyed and delicious. Bon voyage!

So, do you have some 100-lbs. weight loss success story?

Nope. I'm actually hoping the answer to that is 'not yet' instead of just 'nope,' but that remains to be seen. I weighed in this AM fully clothed, shoes on, and with the iPhone in my pocket at 391 lbs. One huge difference with this weigh-in, though, was the way I felt about myself approaching the scale, on the scale, when I saw the number, and getting off the scale. I didn't try to take off my shoes and take my phone out of my pocket. I stepped on, saw the number, noted what I was wearing so I could accurately compare later, and then stepped off. "391...OK, so that's a solid 20 lbs. that I have kept off now for a solid six months. I'll take that."

Wait. What? Kindness to myself on the scale? Yep. Surprised me, too. Totally the first time that's happened. I've been trying to figure out all morning how that could possibly be the case. The fact that I'm engaged? Perhaps - certainly can't discount the awesomeness of that. The fact that I'm writing this blog now? Also a possibility. My hunch, though, is that I've spent a whole lot of time the past several years trying to just be myself. I'm tired of trying to hide myself behind tables when I'm sitting down, positioning my body half behind other people in group pictures, sneaking around rooms hoping that people don't notice the huge girl walking through the room. I'm done with being ashamed of myself. Can we get you there, too? Absolutely. If you're reading this, you should know that I totally am not ashamed of you, and in fact, without even knowing you, I know that you are BEAUTIFUL. You know why I know that? Because EVERY person is beautiful. I'm guessing you still need convinced of that, so we'll keep working on it.

So wait. What IS a health coach?

So glad you asked! I'd never heard of it, either. In fact, most of the time when people ask me what I'm in school for, I get strange looks when I say "to be a health coach" - and this has nothing to do with my curvy figure.

A health coach is a coach. In my case, I want to help you figure out how to get unstuck so that you can get healthier. That simple. We start where you are, which is the only place you can start, really. We can talk about anything: how much water you use to cook rice, how to eat kohlrabi from your CSA, how to get over hating the taste of water. Yep, totally serious. No topic is too minor. Why? Because it's these little details where people get stuck. I went at least a month of not cooking at home before I realized it was just because I had no clean dishes. I did the dishes, re-organized, and then realized I didn't know how to cook vegetables. Baby steps. We'll go at your pace, and we'll figure out what you need. Need help in the kitchen? No problem! Want to take me grocery shopping with you? I'm in! Want to talk about how your partner won't ask you to get married? We can talk about that, too.

One of the major value systems I have thanks to IIN is that food is secondary to other stuff going on in your life. So we can focus on what we're going to call your 'primary foods': your relationships, your job (or lack thereof), your kids, your pets, your budget, your spirituality - whatever you want! These are all Important - so important, that I broke the rules of grammar to capitalize it for emphasis.

This fat chick is a health coach?

In October 2012, I started a certification program at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition (IIN). I started watching and listening to weekly modules about all things nutrition and business: social media, vegetarianism, Ayurveda...you name it. I was preparing to be a health coach. I didn't know why yet.

Fast forward to now: July 29, 2013. I graduate in about 5 weeks' time. I have sat and followed forums on Facebook talking about a myriad of ways to get healthy, and it hasn't motivated me at all. I don't need complicated. I'm not at a place where I need to figure out how to squeeze in X number of vitamins and minerals daily and balance it with Y number of grams of protein. Complicated isn't a place for me to start.

Let me back up a minute. Did I mention that I weighed 411 lbs. when I enrolled at IIN? Yep. Size 32W, 5'6", super obvious that I wasn't the healthiest chick in my class. And until now that has stopped me. The voice in my head has been telling me, "Dudette, who is gonna walk into an office and see YOU sitting there at 411 lbs. and take your advice on anything health-related?"

Well, maybe you shouldn't. If you are already fit and need to optimize your diet for body building, I am not sure that I am the best person to help you. I would be more than happy to talk to you (of course!), but let's talk for a minute about someone that I have helped.

About 18 months ago, my then-best-friend, now-fiancé Ben was having digestive problems. He decided to treat it with dietary changes and took dairy out of his diet. He continued to get sick, and we finally discovered that he had gall stones and needed to have his gallbladder removed. Post-surgery, he attempted to go back to eating dairy, but that made him sick. "No dairy? Ever? No eggs? Ever? What can I eat?" were just a few of the thoughts running through his mind, and we kept working on it together to figure it out.

At the time, he was a typical bachelor, working long hours, getting off work at 10PM, and going home to have less-than-zero energy to use for cooking. His diet? Hot Pockets, lunch meats, dark chocolate peanut butter cups, Taco Bell.

Please don't think for a minute that I'm judging that kind of diet. I just drove to Dunkin' Donuts on my lunch break and got a seriously huge iced caramel latte with whipped cream. It had caramel sauce on top, and it was delicious. I get it. I'm not a food saint.

Here's the thing, though. This weekend, Ben + I spent the weekend together. What is he eating now? Portobello mushroom burgers, guacamole, green beans. Huge change? Yes. Easy change? Hell no.

Ben has insisted that what he didn't need was someone who didn't understand where he was. I do not want to claim that other coaches out there don't know what it's like to be overweight. I can't make that claim for anyone, and I don't honestly want to compare myself. I have spent hours comparing myself to other people, and that type of mentality is for the birds! What I can share, however, is that I do understand. I know what it's like to not be able to fit in a booth at a restaurant. I know what it's like to realize that I'm going to have to 'eat weirdly' in social situations to get healthy. I know what it's like for people to assume that I am stupid, that I'm lazy, etc.

It is my sincere belief that we all have a place where we get stuck. I think there's some thought, some habit, some lack of realization, some something that is keeping us from moving forward. From moving at all. From even knowing that we should move. I think it's different for each person, and often more than one thing. I want to help you figure out what that something(s) is (are). I'm chipping away at finding my own motivation for getting healthy (more on that in another post). But if you're just looking for someone who understands and will absolutely not judge you for where you are now, let's talk!

Pax lux joyeux (peace light joy),
~ Jaimee